Christian dating during divorce

By Tracy Achen If you are thinking about dating during divorce ... You may think that you are free to start a new relationship once the decision is made to separate or divorce.But it is wise to hold off on the dating scene until after your divorce is finalized for a number of strategic, legal, and emotional reasons.Legal reasons not to date before divorce As far as the courts are concerned, you are still legally married until the divorce is finalized.

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(God’s heart is to heal marriages.)If your spouse is the one deciding on divorce, you may not be able to stop him or her through current divorce laws.

However, you can try to persuade your spouse to consider a legal separation first, which would give you both more time to consider the issue.

Pray that God will open the lines of communication between you and your spouse and that He will restore the love in your relationship. Try to resist the temptation to say angry words to your spouse or do things that would push him or her further away.

Restoration does occur even in the most hostile circumstances, but it is more difficult when harsh words have passed between you.

Malachi -16 gives us a clear look into God’s heart for marriage: Another thing you do: You flood the Lord’s altar with tears. They asked, ‘Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?

You weep and wail because he no longer pays attention to your offerings or accepts them with pleasure from your hands. ” It is because the Lord is acting as the witness between you and the wife of your youth, because you have broken faith with her, though she is your partner, the wife of your marriage covenant. '”“Haven’t you read,” He replied, “that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’ and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh”? Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.”Because, as an attorney, I’ve represented many people going through divorce, I understand why God says, “I hate [it]! (In Colorado, for example, if one spouse files for divorce, the other cannot stop it from occurring.) Nonetheless, it’s important that we in the Body of Christ encourage those in troubled marriages to seek counseling and restoration — because most divorces are neither necessary nor unavoidable.

If you are concerned about whether you have biblical grounds for divorce, you will need to commit the matter to prayer and study.

You should also seek out counsel from your own pastor and, ideally, a licensed Christian counselor. But biblical grounds may exist: If you are a follower of Jesus Christ, please pray carefully about your decision to divorce, and be open to God’s leading.

Even if your husband has carried on numerous affairs during your marriage, he will not think that you are justified in seeing someone new at this time.

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